Forgiveness

I just read a short article on forgiveness by Brad over at Challies Community Blog. In the story that Brad tells a woman asks forgiveness from a friend who then says that she’ll have to pray about it because she is really not ready to forgive. The sad thing is when her actions were questioned, others jumped to this womans defense as if praying to the Lord as to whether or not to forgive was some great act of piety… and this was supposed to be a group of Christians.

As Brad says, “…I’m under no delusion about how difficult and sometimes complicated forgiveness can be.“, and neither am I. Forgiveness is a very hard topic for me, because I am so horrid at it. I hold grudges and question peoples intent towards me like a shield of protection. In my twisted way of perceiving wrongs (even unintentional ones), if I don’t show my disdain, hurt and anger then I am being weak and feel that I am opening myself up to more abuse. I didn’t start out writing this as a cathartic self examination of my own short comings, yet that is what this is turning into. As I listen to myself write this, I can’t help but see how pathetic my thoughts and actions are in this arena. Especially in light of all that the Lord has forgiven me for.

I once heard a sermon on forgiving others, an anecdotal story went something like this,

“…so I’m at this party at a friends house and I’m really enjoying my evening. The front door opens and in walks this person I was really hoping I’d not see. This person had really done me wrong the week before and just seeing them made me fuming mad. With furrowed brows and ruby lasers dancing out of my eyes, I glared at them, showing them my anger at them being here. This person then made their way across the room, came right up to me and in greeting shook my hand like nothing was wrong. They then went on their way and appeared to enjoy the rest of the evening while I sat there fuming.”

Now out of this situation who was being hurt most? The person who should have been asking for forgiveness hadn’t a clue that there was anything to ask forgiveness for! In not forgiving others, even if it’s only in our own hearts, we sin in a way that is detrimental to us both spiritually as well as mentally.

Obviously in personally looking at this issue, I have a lot to still take to heart!

May the forgiveness of God, through the atoning sacrifice of our Lord, allow all of us the grace and mercy to forgive our transgressors.

Peace